The Meaning of Things
Things embody goals, make skills manifest, and shape the identities of their users. Man is not only homo sapiens or homo ludens, he is also homo faber, the maker and user of objects, his self to a large extent a reflection of things with which he interacts.
–Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and; Eugene Rochberg-Halton
The Meaning of Things: Domestic Symbols and the Self (1999)
Many years ago I was sitting in a statistics class listening to Professor Ann Wax have the unenviable task of explaining to undergraduates the difference between reliability and validity. Her brilliant treatment of the topic came in the form of a story; which to this day I still recall with admiration.
Professor Wax began her narrative by telling us about a death in the family. Her aunt, who lived back east, had passed away and being prudent before she died had labeled various personal items to be dispersed among surviving relatives.
This was a favorite aunt of Dr. Wax and she received her share of meaningful things in the mail from her estate. One large slender package stuck out however because it was wrapped with the care offered a new born baby. When she carefully unveiled the object to her surprise it was a closet mirror…that cheap kind you adhere to the back of a door.
Why on earth had she taken the time and effort to wrap an item that could be bought at any Target or Wal-Mart and mail it across the country?
It soon became apparent why this was one of her aunt’s cherished objects—when Dr. Wax casually looked at her image in the mirror she appeared 15lbs slimmer!
For many years the mirror had made her aunt appear 15lbs lighter every time she saw her image (reliable), but she in fact was still her current weight (validity). So, the mirror was reliable…but not valid.
Lesson learned…
The Meaning of Things
“Is there one personal possession you value above all others?” This was a key question put to respondents in a survey. More than 4 of every 5 respondents were readily able to identify such an object. Gender difference appeared as men identified more consumer items and women more symbolic items like photographs and jewelry.
For adults over 75 more of them (30%) could identify no cherished object as compare to only 8% of the younger respondents. The researchers found out this was because many of the older participants lived in nursing homes and lack of cherished things was associated with the absence of one’s own home.
The findings for the researchers proved Institutional care often means moving into a place bereft of meaningful things that surround one in the home. “The almost symbiotic bond between home and objects is severed” (p.66)
From the glass roses I presented to my friend in the nursing home lasting 2 weeks before being knocked off the window-ledge (broken by a nurse-aide); to the antique Santa that I had to identify as hers by labeling it with black marking pen (nursing home necessity), meaningful things can lose meaning in institutions.
Beyond Materialism
Csikszentmihalyi and Rochberg-Halton note:
Objects affect what a person can do, either by expanding or restricting the scope of that person’s actions and thoughts. And because what a person does is largely what he or she is, objects have a determining effect on the development of the self, which is why understanding the type of relationship that exists between people and things is so crucial.
Aging in place can maintain that essential bond between people and things. It’s a reliable and valid way for us to continue to interact with meaningful objects which delight the senses and support our identity.
See
For more on the study, see: Home and Identity in Late Life (2005) Eds: Graham D. Rowles and Habib Chaudhury, chapter 4.
(photo thepaintedgarden.blogspot.com)
5 Comments for this entry
Lynn Schweikart
Poignant article. Maybe the desire to stay at home is less about the place and more about not losing the connections and stories associated with the objects and memories in the place. Interesting business challenge for a company that runs nursing homes: how to be the place that eliminates depersonalization
Patrick Roden PhD
Thanks for the Comment Lynn-
You’ve identified a key issue: How to be the place that eliminates depersonalization?
Find a book called “Limbo” by Carobeth Laird (1979); best description of the issue I’ve ever read.
Roberta
What a beautiful and powerful article. I have had experience with cherished things belonging to cherished people (my parents) in nursing homes. The loss of my Dad’s glasses still haunts me. How could someone have taken his glasses, how could we have prevented their loss?
In his final days he could not clearly see faces of the people he loved. His mind was totally sharp it was his body that was sick. After the morning that we discovered that they had disappeared over night he never mentioned them again. We could not get a new perscription fast enough. He never again saw us or the smile of his beloved grandchildren.
Cherished objects become cherished because they connect us to the world and to ourselves. We cannot dismiss them as unimportant – they are part of what helps us to live and eventually to let go at peace.
Patrick Roden PhD
Roberta,
Your comment is why I write; this means so much to me.
It’s heart-breaking to read about your father and his glasses.
Your contribution is powerful and makes my points in a most personal way.
I will never forget this story…
Patrick
Angeline
My mother died at 98 1/2 years old .
In the last few years of life she boxed up most of her things –
An in-law visited her, and WITHOUT invitation, went through her home, in her presence and opened cabinets, opened boxes . When I discovered her in the process of doing this – I intervened , but too late to prevent the “premature” taking of some of the items.
I later brought the matter up with my daughter-in-law who explained to me that she and her twin sister took the jewelry of her maternal grandmother – and told the grandmother that they would put it in a SAFE DEPOSIT BOX – and that they would get it out for her if she wanted to wear it – but this way, the jewelry would be safe! I was horrified – and she told me this without any apology .
When she last visited our home – the first thing she did was to head straight for my bedroom – pushing my young (4 yo ) grand child ahead of her. I quietly followed behind – unbeknownst to her . When they arrived in the bedroom – I asked why they were there – she explained that my grand child “wanted to jump on the bed – putting her up on the bed as if it were a trampoline ! I asked them to leave the bedroom. Obviously she wanted to inventory our possessions and perhaps “safeguard ?” MY jewelry.
I find her behavior disgusting and will make certain that my OWN jewelry is sold BEFORE I die – but sadly this greedy “entitled” generation has no shame.
Her husband, my son, has two chidren with her – so I do not want to i
The Things We Cherish | Home for a Lifetime, May 9th, 2011 on 8:48 pm
[...] often gets me thinking about things differently, and this week was no exception. In his article, The Meaning of Things, he talks about the important bond between people and personal objects and a study that backed up [...]